Chugging along

Another week is down and it went ok.  MIL is going out to the barn to feed the cats without anyone with her.  I suspected something was  up with the cats out there, because they weren't rushing to meet me when I came to feed them in the evening.  Now I know why -- she had already fed them in the morning!  We had told, asked and begged her not to go out to the barn by herself, but she is taking those times when DH isn't there and doing it anyway.  I guess it's ok because she isn't falling or hurting herself, but I am concerned that it would be so easy for her to misstep or a cat to tangle in her feet and bring her down.  Now, the question is: will she actually tell us if she falls when we are not there?  I think that she is afraid that if she falls and tells us, the little bit of freedom she has when DH isn't staying there, will be gone.
My mom asked a good question: WHY is she supposed to have 24/7 supervision?  I thought it was the blood thinner, but mom pointed out that there are gobs of people on blood thinners who don't have to be supervised all the time.  Maybe the Dr's picked up on her stubbornness and the too think that she won't be honest about letting us know if she falls?  She was weaker and her balance wasn't 100% when she left the hospital, so that might have been part of it.  Maybe the Dr's felt it was too much fall risk for her to be alone?  Or maybe her confusion is why?  Her confusion is not really from the stroke, she's always been a little slow and gets mixed up easily. 
So after thinking this over, I'd like to set up an appointment with the Neurologist to revisit why he wanted her to have 24/7 supervision.  Also, at the same appointment, I can bring up driving.  She has been talking about "taking classes" and "getting tested" so she can "start driving again."  I don't want to have to be the bad guy telling her she'll never drive again.  I can handle reminding her about what the doctor said, but I need him to tell her first and really try to get it across to her.  Hearing it from more than just her kids, might help her know it's not just us being mean to her.  It's really a medical decision.
Not a single bit of quilting has happened at my place :(  But, I did learn to crochet last week, yippee!  I took my sample swatches that I made over to my crochet neighbor and she said I'm doing great!  She said my stitches were nice and even.  I made it through single crochet, half-double, double, treble and then circles.  I only made little sample swatches as I worked through the lessons in the book I bought.  When I got to circles, I was able to make pretty flowers so that was cool!  And, I came up with a great way to salvage my favorite skirt!!  I spilled some bleach on it last summer when adding chemicals to the pool and it left little dots trailing down one side from the front pocket down to about the back of my knee.  It might not have been so bad, but a couple of the dots were about the size of a small lima bean  and one of them wore into a hole :(  But I'm going to put little crochet flowers and leaves onto the skirt, sort of trailing down the side and around to the back - it will cover the hole and the few spots that are still there, plus it will add some neat dimension and interest to the skirt.  This is one of my favorite skirts, so I"m thrilled to be able to make it wearable again (I mean, a middle aged lady just CAN'T go around town in a skirt with a small hole on her tushy!!)
We took the chicks out into the run today so they could enjoy the pretty, warm day.  They were a little freaked out about it at first.  They just stood there and didn't even move for a couple of minutes - it was funny!  But they eventually began walking around, spreading their wings and scratching the ground.  I'll try to get some pix added to this post - it's been awhile since I've had pix with a post, and I know they make the posts more fun!
Tonight, we are taking littlest DD to meet up for her first date.  She is going to a school get together with a young man from church.  The two have been texting for a few months and it's been pretty obvious to everyone at church (heck, even DH noticed!!) that they like each other.  So he asked her to go to this event with him (dinner, bowling, scavenger hunt, and another meal to end the night around 2 or 3 in the morning).  Now when they first talked about this event, they were both saying the were going "just as friends"  But looks like they have had some change of heart as they texted more and spent time together at church. Earlier in the week he messaged me and asked permission to "ask her out" on a "real" date.  She thinks he's going to ask her while they are together at the function tonight, and for all intents and purposes, tonight has turned into a date too.  She's all atwitter about it, that's for sure!  Here are two pix from the night - first is after he gave her "the" note asking her to be his girlfriend (and yep, I still have my first note like that asking me to "go steady" with a boy when I was 15 *sigh*) and the second is the more formal pose that was being taken there.

Ah, isn't first love cute :)

Going ok, so far . . . . .

Well, we took over caring for MIL on the 24th of Feb. and the first week went pretty great really.  Our only hiccup came at the end of the week.  When I came to her house Friday evening we were going to set up her pills for the week.  Only 4 of the 5 bottles were on the table.  I looked and looked (even crawling under the table on my hands and knees!) but couldn't find it.  Then I got the idea to look in the trash.  BINGO!  There was the bottle with the label torn off, and a little more digging found 5 pills.  DD was there and she dug around for the rest of them.  Luckily it was all paper garbage, not coffee grounds or tuna fish cans, LOL.  When asked if she threw them out, of course MIL said "no."  And I asked if she had any idea how they got there, "No."  I spent some time trying to explain why these were important (it was her Crestor) and she gave me her reasons why she shouldn't be taking it anymore.  Really great stuff like "I'm allergic to it and the family Dr. knows it, he took me off Crestor years ago and told me I'd never have to take it again"  Mind you, she admitted into the hospital with it as one of her "current meds."  So that doesn't really hold up.  Then she tried, "It's the same as this other one (because they are both light peach in color!) so I can't take them both!"  Basically, she just convinced herself that she wasn't going to take them and wasn't going to listen to anything I had to say.  I asked if she would throw them away again if I left them there and she said "Probably."  So I took them when I left that night.  She had an appointment with the family doctor coming up the next Wednesday.  I looked online and there aren't any horrible side effects from going off it cold turkey, so  I decided to let it go until we saw the Doctor.

At that appointment, he said all the same things I said.  Those side effects were not from the medication.  She's tired and dizzy from the AFib, not the Crestor.  And Crestor doesn't cause a rash.  She still didn't care and wasn't going to accept it.  He told her to take it for 3 or 4 days more and if there were side effects that were bad, then she could set it aside.  She told DD later when asked about the appointment, "Only 4 more days!"  With a chuckle.  So what SHE heard is, "take it for 4 more days, then you can quit."  *sigh* 

The other problem is that DH & I don't see eye to eye on keeping someone there 24/7.  He thinks it's fine to let her be alone and if she has a fall or a problem she can just call us.  This is crazy because it depends on her 1. calling for help - which she never, never does.  2. being honest about how she is feeling, which she also never, never does and again, calling for help when she is not feeling well.  3. following the "rules" about not going outside without anyone, using her cane, no stairs, etc.  So I am still going over for all my "shifts" and just hanging out.  But now, in only the second week of this, he is going on Thursday and Friday morning for a short visit and then coming home and going to bed.  So she is alone from, say, 9am until I get there around 5pm.  *another sigh* I understand his problem with being there, he is not getting enough sleep and has fallen asleep at work - that could get him fired!  But, yesterday he did this for the first time, and she went outside alone and got the mail and paper.  Luckily, no falls or incidents, but next time?  Who knows? 

He says I'm not listening to him, when he says we don't need to be there 24/7, but I also think he's not hearing me.  He gets upset because he says my questioning his plan is saying I'm saying he doesn't "know" his mom.  But you know, in a way I don't think he does.  He knows she is stubborn, and he knows she is determined, but he doesn't seem to know that this stubborn determined thing takes its form in her throwing away medication and going out to the road.  And she doesn't regret either one of those examples.  She would do them again - heck, she's alone today, maybe she DID go out to the mailbox.  What if she had thrown away her blood thinner instead of cholesterol medicine?  What if I hadn't noticed?  How long before another stroke?  And God help us, what if this one was bigger?  He tells her THAT, but she is like most people, thinking "Oh, that won't happen to me, I'll be fine."  And that's the part he is disconnected from.  She thinks "Oh, it's just down the sidewalk, to the mailbox.  There's no snow or ice, I have my cane . . . . I'll be just fine, nothing will happen."  But you know what, falls happen, accidents happen.  We aren't at her house to "give care" but mostly just to "be there in case."  And yes, it does feel like a lot of wasted time.  Nothing happens and we aren't needed.  I sit there for 10 hours on her couch listening to TV shows I don't like (CSI, NCIS, Law & Order Special Victims & Criminal Minds -- SOOOO Depressing and dark!  I hate even just hearing it & having it in my brain!!!!) and hand quilting or doing our bills & budgets.  Just busywork, not really accomplishing anything.

So, now we head into our second weekend - DD & I will both be gone all day tomorrow (7:30am to 5 or 6pm) and MIL will be at our house for the day.  I'll be interested to hear how it goes, what happens.  Poor her though, DH will be watching what he likes, so it's "mountain men" - type reality shows for her all day, LOL.

Of course, my quilting isn't getting done, so the charm quilt didn't make it to the Bloomington show, heck, it only has about 2 passes done.  I'm just doing a meandering feather all over the pieced section, rather than more custom quilting.  The thread colors were just going to be a nightmare with all the different color fabrics.  I have a pretty table runner that's pieced and ready to quilt as a wedding gift for a gal at church.  Her wedding is at the end of April.  It's in greens and mustard yellows.  She likes those colors.  I'm going to quilt in their names and the wedding date so it will be a special keepsake for them!

I also have the superhero t-shirt quilt to quilt up.  The backing is going to be great, and I can't wait to return it to Sonya and see her reaction!